Paul tells us that to love his wife, a man gives himself to his wife. Peter tells us that he knows her exceedingly well. He knows her dreams, fears, desires, hopes, longings, strengths, and weaknesses. He knows how to serve her and minister to her and how to lead her spiritually.
This does not happen accidentally. It happens when the husband is intentional and purposeful in spending time with his wife and deferring his interests to hers.
Kent Hughes puts it this way:
…the discipline of deference must be carefully practiced. Many men never forego a planned pleasure for the sake of their wives. For some men, golf is synonymous to Dante’s Paradiso, but the entrance to a department store is like the gates of Dante’s hell, bearing the inscription: “Abandon all hope all ye who enter here.” But if you love your wife, there must be times when you forsake the heavenly greens because you value her interests and simply love her.